Today I decided to reflect on a “leap”. There are all sorts of leaps that we make throughout our lives. For me, one of my “leaps” is quite obviously my asana practice. Going to yoga is much more than just attending class, it is a part of my daily life. Each day is arranged around practice- when I eat, how much I eat, how much I drink- what these things are specifically…and each time I practice I take a leap. Whether physically or emotionally- Yoga is also becoming a type of security that has taught me to move through life in a way that is constantly evolving with no “end” in sight, there will always be something to work on, always be something to learn. How this happened, no idea. I just kept going, invested my being- and here I am, years later infused with physical and emotional tools that are constantly changing shape.

So, where is the leap? You ask… Yes, it is true- this is not that much of a leap of faith as it is continual integration- to most people it will seem as so. But, if you’ll give me just a moment, I think I’ll be able to get this out… For me personally, dealing with grief, has been much more than a trying process. Yes, it’s true- this is not my initial leap into yoga- but this topic will make the most sense. When in grief- things are turned upside down and inside out. Not many things make sense. Somehow you are left with your Self and you get to figure it out.

We all have choices we are given during these moments that seem to string together endlessly. Even if we can’t really decipher them, they exist. There are numerous un-seen gifts and hidden teachers in each and every thing we do. When I eventually made it back into the Yoga studio it was monumental to me. I quite honestly can not remember which class it was, I’m not even sure I explained what had happened to my family… I just went. Without any clue as too what would happen. Would I cry? Would I be able to stay for the whole class? Can I talk to people? Can I take care of myself? (leaps 1, 2 &3) I cannot tell you details really- but what I can tell you is that during the grieving I went through this process over and over, so many times that I even note this process happening to this day.

Last night I exclaimed “I used to be a very motivated person, what happened to me?!?!” and I didn’t just say it, it burst out of me and took something with it. The sound reverberated around me, went back into my head and bounced around in there for a while until it echoed out my eyes and I became blinded by it. With that echo I stopped trying to work and sat. Quietly. Wondering how I can flow with this ocean of a persona I have and not drown in it. I have always been a very good swimmer, not fast but strong. I went to sleep this way- wondering. I woke up reminding myself that there really is no other way besides the unknown. No matter what I do.

Motivation. If I brought any of this up with any of my friends that I see regularly they all have a consistent response. Meditate. Yes, I know meditate. But what I am talking about is something different. So many people ponder “back in the day” as if what they did “back then” is something possible to “replicate”- well, it isn’t! and there is no reason to try that, this is a lesson I learned quite young- but most of the time art related …. But to apply this to my life- takes work- a certain other kind of motivation. So we have to “double up” in this now- digging around in there wondering- where this mess came from… and to top it all off, none of this actually matters. None of this is unique and none of it will make me die. Some of it causes an un-necessary amount of strife because of habit which can lead the way to some suffering – which is exactly where I don’t need to end up again.

So, motivation. To “build” it seems like some foreign language- there is a “drive” missing… shoved deep down… a “non bail out” clause that has to be enacted… and I do believe mine is found in Asana. That if there is one daily thing, it’s that- NOT drawing NOT photo – Asana

{pictured: Khristine Jones}

Yoga For Hope, San Francisco

More to come…

two

A little bit ago I challenged myself to 15 days @ 15 minutes of meditation- During the 15 days I sat at whichever time of day worked out for me. One or two days I missed throughout the 15. The haphazard-ness of when to sit isn’t exactly comforting. Constantly worried that I would forget – which a lot of days I did, but remembered with just barely enough time to “squeeze it in”. This, to me, is not carving out the time. So, when the 15 days was up- I unconsciously let it all go. I (now, I know I have already talked about this) completely understand morning meditation, even more now, and why people do that. I, however can not force myself to do that, at least, not now.

After the meditation stopped, things started changing rapidly. The things I had enacted just weeks before with ease, started to become mountains to climb. And then the dreams started. A dream sequence that is, in the least, disconcerting and annoying. They are all very specific, with one root that will remain void here. But, on top of that, the billowing clouds that hold these dreams keep letting loose these formations of thought steeped in history of habitual thought. Certain inequities thrust upon a human at an unfortunate age that in some lives inform the future. “Things” that never had any weight or form except someone believed it to be true .. and how these recordings re-play themselves with some sort of created connection that has no link. No way to even explain it because there is no brain to talk to. No information can be passed in this manner- only concocted. And, with this, future is made because there is some sort of belief by someone, somewhere, that doesn’t even breathe. “Rewinding” and pressing play again only creates a deadened receptor that then loses it’s synapse .. but then, somehow, connects to the street. The electrical, fully functioning, mobile pathways where the rest of the relationships can be thwarted. Each and every light goes out and only the humans that can see the switch can rectify that.

What’s my point here?

Meditation works.

Even if every single relationship falls out of the sky, and you are meditating regularly and with a semblance of gratefulness, you will not fall with them. Even if no one understands you again. Even if people don’t bother to try and see, it ultimately, in the end, does not matter. And, each time this happens, know, it will happen again. Some sort of sick and twisted “Déjà Vu”. Moments that have built since childhood, crumble at this realization. No matter how much you “wish” it to not be so, it is really out of your hands‑ this wish is founded upon a non-connection and ultimately informs your psyche of a “Bad Habit” to latch back onto. Yes, this can be unfortunate and cause sadness, but, in the end- no matter how hard it is to get through, this is good information- sure it’s confusing- and for me personally, it is a struggle.

I have all but had to change my entire life around- look at it from all sides and make a decision. Most of my life has been much of a guessing game, no one seems to get that (but as I said, doesn’t really matter) That being said- when you spend most of your life dealing constantly with other people’s inability to communicate- you have the great adventure of learning how to communicate on your own- not only with other people- but more difficultly – with your SELF. For me, this part is most difficult because of those childhood guessing games- and, if you are, the “Middle Marriage Child” (mind you, and EXTREME difference to being the “middle child”- a “Middle Marriage Child”, to me, is when both of your parents “start over”) this is even more challenging. Imagine- a 6 year old artist living with people that are supremely confused by A- her and B- their own lives and ultimately begin passing said child around. A young child at certain developmental ages, this doesn’t exactly fare well in future relationships of either kind since these are “learned” skills that family and society are “supposed” to aid in the growth of.

So, basically, all that being said- it’s all crap we learn- and therefore we can unlearn it. The only things we can’t un-do are the ways people connect to their own lives and moments. No matter what.

Solution?

Go meditate.

Photography: Faern

Writing: Erica Rodefer

“As I’ve become more devoted to my practice, I have tried to bring more of “my mat” into my workplace. I hope that what I am trying to cultivate in terms of calmness, curiosity, and peace in my life – both at work and at home – adds something to the people around me.” – Abbie

Find ways to incorporate yoga clothing into your work wardrobe. I wear a mala to work nearly every day. I also wear yoga tops in the place of camisoles. That way even though I am conforming to my office culture and look “professional” I have little reminders of my practice even when I’m in meetings away from my desk. (And it makes changing for yoga after work a breeze!)

Take stretch breaks often. There are lots of poses you can do right in your desk chair. My favorite desk stretches are seated twists (using the arm rests for extra traction), Cow Face Pose, and–when no one is looking–seated Cat-Cows and Tolasana from my desk chair!

Listen to kirtan. I love listening to music while I work, but songs with lyrics are distracting when you work with words. Kirtan is soothing and reminds me of my yoga practice, and the fact that I don’t understand the words is a bonus because I can just enjoy the vibrations.

Take a deep breath every time you get a phone call or email. This is my trick to manage stress and communicate mindfully.

Erica Rodefer is a writer and yoga enthusiast in Charleston, SC. Visit her blog, Spoiledyogi.com, follow her on Twitter, or like her on Facebook.

Faern is an Artist, yoga practitioner and Photographer in San Francisco. Besides making as much time for tea as possible, you can find Faern in a yoga class, at her current art show or wandering the city via public transportation. You can visit her in various places online: FaernWorks website, Twitter, Facebook, Faern in the Works Blog.

Would you like to take part in this project as a model? Please be in touch by emailing this address sohum.selfexpression@gmail.com and we’ll send more information. If you are not in the Bay Area or planning a visit, do not worry, there are travel plans afoot, subscribe to the blogs http://www.faern-in-the-works.com and http://spoiledyogi.blogspot.com/ to keep in touch and get updates on travel plans. **please note: replies are numerous, they take a long time

Days10 &11

there are pods

Day10 (july 21, 2011)

16 minutes
Its all about making the time. Understanding why it’s important but also that it is just time…

Day11 (yesterday)

Today I came home from an evening asana class and realized that I had forgotten to sit b/c i was trying so darn hard to complete something that was just completely tugging at my emotions. Then I realized that if I just sat, right then, I could do it.
So I did. It was 15 minutes, and I tell ya, the 15 minutes were all over the place. I had come out of class crying so by the time I got home I was seemingly “calm” but really “still flowing” on the inside- which means I couldn’t really release to the breath fully, for very long, that is.
but I did it, and today that is all that matters-
Note: first time right after class (well, after coming home)

post note: 1/2 hr later- even though my physical body was quite uncomfortable for the 15 minutes AND my mind didn’t feel calmed-
*I can feel more clarity now*
it is apparent.

thanks for reading!

Models: Jeremy Simon and Seren Rubens

Story: Erica Rodefer
Photography: Faern

“Yoga has taught me how to live in harmony with myself and those around me. Practicing challenging poses, especially in partnership, has helped me to find the path of resistance.”

– Jeremy Simon

• What do you love about yoga community?
  
• What do you struggle with?
  
• How has yoga changed the way you relate to people?

“Who is behind this project?”

Faern is an artist, yoga practitioner and photographer in San Francisco. Besides making as much time for tea as possible, you can find Faern in a yoga class, at her current art show or wandering the city via public transportation. You can visit her in various places online: FaernWorks website, Twitter, Facebook,Faern in the Works Blog.

Erica Rodefer is a writer and yoga enthusiast in Charleston, SC. Visit her blog, Spoiledyogi.com, follow her on Twitter, or like her on Facebook.

Would you like to take part in this community based project as a model? Please be in touch by emailing this address sohum.selfexpression@gmail.com and we’ll send more information. If you are not in the Bay Area or planning a visit, do not worry, there are travel plans afoot, subscribe to the blogs  http://www.faern-in-the-works.com  and http://spoiledyogi.blogspot.com/  to keep in touch and get updates on travel plans. *please note: replies are numerous, they take a little time

Parivrtta Surya Yantrasana: Compass or Sundial Pose « Pose of the Month.

Writing & Model: Chrisandra Fox

Photography: Faern, faernworks.com

In the Vedas, Moksha refers to the soul’s “release” or liberation from bondage to samsara, or the cycle of birth, death and rebirth.

The Yoga tradition teaches that samsara includes the continuous flow of life’s daily experiences – the daily roller coaster ride of passion, emotions, desire and experience. And moksha is freedom from getting rocked on the ride.

The roller coaster is the small births and the deaths we experience daily. These represent hopes and the loss of hope.

I hope I can get my foot behind my head today.

I’ll never get my foot behind my head!

Yoga provides a skillful means for gradually and consistently recognizing these cycles, and interrupting their unconscious repetition. Yoga strengthens the capacity to abide in the fiery center of the ups and downs.

When you take a long journey, you bring a GPS, or, in the old school, a compass. Yoga is this tool, this inner sense of knowing which step to take next, the stability to dwell in that knowing and the courage to change direction when we’ve gone off course.

To live in moksha is to live the life we are living now fearlessly, with purpose and success. Many of us benefit from having a compass.

This month’s pose, Parivrtta Surya Yantrasana honors and celebrates the process of unfolding moksha in this lifetime.

A beautiful hip opener, sidebend and twist, Compass Pose asks us to be both steady and inspired to fearlessly unwind our tendencies and perceived limitations.

This pose is challenging. But if we are willing to look honestly through the body into our hearts, we can “see” where we truly are and skillfully redirect our inner knowing to the goal.

Beyond hopes, beyond loss of hope.

The Pose

Sit in Dandasana. Bend your right leg and place your heel near your left sitting bone. Bend your left leg in toward your chest. Draw your left knee back toward the left side of your ribcage.

Take a few breaths here, balancing your weight on both sitting bones, and coaxing your thighbone to externally rotate in the hip socket.

Now, nestle your left leg behind your left elbow. Work slowly to bring the back of your left knee or thigh up high on your arm and toward the back of your shoulder. Cultivate a smooth rhythm in your breath.

Once you’ve found a landing spot for the back of your left leg, lean forward, and slide the back of your shoulder in a little more snug. Then, take hold of the pinky-toe side of your left foot with your right hand. You can use a strap for this.

Reach your left arm out beyond your left leg and shift your weight into your right sitting bone. Lean off your right hip, soften your left side body.

Ground your weight into your right sitting bone and left hand, and continue to soften and melt any resistances in your left side waist with a smooth and rhythmic flow of your breath.

Move your inner left thigh away from your chest to widen the back of your left leg and to help you straighten it. Press through the sole of your left foot and continue to widen the back of your left leg. Now, turn the center of your chest – your spiritual heart – and ribcage to the right.

This pose can be more of a lateral pose, or side-bend, or open-belly twist, depending on which way your direct your inner compass.

In whichever orientation you’ve chosen, stabilize your balance through grounding your right sitting bone and right leg. You can vary the intensity by pressing your weight evenly through both sitting bones and bowing your right ribcage, widening your right side body.

Slow your breathing. Keep your eye gaze steady and soft as you deepen into your steady point of balance and open through your torso.

If your hamstrings are tight, be honest with that and work with a strap, or keep your knee bent. Remember, the path of liberation is long, sometimes slow and steady. Enjoy each moment of turning your compass. Be guided by your sense of grounding toward the earth and soaring toward your greatest aspiration of freedom.

• Chrisandra Fox is pursuing a yogic path of liberation and shares these practices in 5 weekly classes at Yoga Tree. She is a primary teacher in Yoga Tree’s 200-hour Teacher Training and leads The Heart of Renewal Retreats.

• Faern is an Artist, yoga practitioner and Photographer in San Francisco. Besides making as much time for tea as possible, you can find Faern in a yoga class, at her current art show or wandering the city via public transportation. You can visit her in various places online: FaernWorks website, Twitter, Facebook, Faern in the Works Blog.

Please click below to go to the “home” of ‘Pose of the Month’

Model: Hydi
Story: Erica Rodefer
Photography: Faern

“Through yoga I have learned that I am exactly who I want to be, and as long as I keep it
real nothing else can be expressed!” – Hydi

“Keeping it real” is a lesson that many of us have to be beaten over the head with…
figuratively, of course (most of the time). After all, it’s hard to really be you when you
don’t really understand who “you” is in the first place. I’ve found that yoga is an amazing
tool for peeling back the layers of stuff to reveal more of the true “you.”

After years of practicing yoga, one thing I’ve learned is that there really is no
constant “me.” Like a yoga pose that feels great one day and yucky the next, who I am
is always evolving. There are no constants to identify with except for who I am in the
moment. The past is just a memory – and who knows what the future holds? All we can
do is to “keep it real” and express ourselves in the present.

That’s exactly what Hydi is doing in the image above (read her interview here)—and
that’s exactly what the So-Hum photo blog project is all about!

5 Ways to “Keep it Real” with Yoga

1. Don’t worry about what other people think. Do your own thing, experience the
pose fully, and OWN it!
2. Never do anything that doesn’t feel right in the moment in yoga class. Never
EVER do anything that hurts. Modify your poses to work for your body, mind,
and spirit.
3. Wear clothes that fit your body and your personality and make YOU feel great.
4. Embrace your strengths. Embrace your weaknesses even more—these are
opportunities for learning. Never be ashamed of your flaws.
5. Never feel guilty. Never apologize. Never ask for permission. Just follow your
intuition, breathe deeply, be mindful, and let life unfold.

What ways do you “keep it real” with yoga?

Erica Rodefer is a writer and yoga enthusiast in Charleston, SC. Visit her blog, Spoiledyogi.com, follow her on Twitter, or like her on Facebook.

Faern is an Artist, yoga practitioner and Photographer in San Francisco. Besides making as much time for tea as possible, you can find Faern in a yoga class, at her current art show or wandering the city via public transportation. You can visit her in various places online: FaernWorks website, Twitter, Facebook, Faern in the Works Blog.

Would you like to take part in this project as a model? Please be in touch by emailing this address sohum.selfexpression@gmail.com and we’ll send more information. If you are not in the Bay Area or planning a visit, do not worry, there are travel plans afoot, subscribe to the blogs  http://www.faern-in-the-works.com  and http://spoiledyogi.blogspot.com/  to keep in touch and get updates on travel plans. *please note: replies are numerous, they take a little time

Pose of the Month

With Chrisandra Fox

Photography: Faern, Faernworks.com

Sirsasana (Headstand) balances the body, mind and emotions, and can initiate a playful dance between the expanse of our spirit and the depth of our soul.

Like two sides of a coin, the play of spirit and soul reveals two interconnected dimensions of being.

According to the teachings of Michael Meade, Spirit reflects the outward and uprising expansion of energy that is intelligent, unifying and transcendent. Soul brings us more deeply into the body and the heart, its multiplicity of experience, the depth of emotion and even the mystery of not-knowing.*

As we align the body and mind in headstand, cultivate our breath and increase concentration to maintain the balance, our spiritual dimension, or sense of awareness expands. We may become one with the form, gaining a sense of absolute-ness in our experience.

As we hold this pose, allowing the stability to build, our focus may be drawn toward our individual, unique self and a multiplicity of experience. We may meet resistance in our sensations, our thoughts and emotions – anything that prevents us from perceiving the “Oneness” we may have felt before.

As we re-connect with our breath to receive our present experience (fear of falling, shakiness, boredom) and meet resistance with patience, we enter a soulful place of intimacy within ourselves and to our Source, bringing us back to the Oneness and the expansion of spirit.

The journey from spirit to soul and soul to spirit is a continuum we may experience in every pose, from basic to advanced.

Sirsasana so elegantly invites us to move between the ecstatic outward expression of spirit and the co-existing deep inward movement of soul, providing an opportunity for balance.

Headstand requires tremendous steadiness, both in the physical body and in mental concentration. As your body and mind gain stability, you may notice a quality of lightness, an ascending grace and perhaps an expansion of breath that inspires you to go further and further and higher and higher.

As you meet that ascending quality within yourself, notice the downward wave of gravity that helps you root and ground.

As the matrix of your bodymind reorients to being turned upside down, you may feel your body falling out and falling back in toward the center. Use that “falling” to attune and adjust to the subtle shifts in your body that help you stay steady, as though you are riding a wave of energy and moving more deeply inside that wave to connect to its stillness.

By cultivating this recognition of non-striving, but responding to where we are, we enter that soulful space of comfort and ease within our own skin, while shining in the bright light of awareness.

The Pose

Come to all fours. You’ll lower your forearms to the floor and bring your elbows shoulder-width apart. Interlace the webbing of your fingers, bring your weight onto both pinky fingers. Lower the crown of your head to the floor so that the back of your head rests in your hands.

Then, curl your toes under and lift your pelvis up. Walk your feet in toward your head until you can stack your shoulders above your wrists.  Draw your shoulder blades strongly in toward your chest and press down through your forearms, lifting your outer upper arms up and rolling your shoulders away from your ears.

Engage strongly through your abdominal muscles.

Bend your knees, inhale and lift your legs up toward the sky. As you invert your legs, re-establish your root to the earth by pressing firmly through your outer wrists and directing the weight through the crown of your head. Keep your inner wrists drawn in toward the sides of your head and press them down into the floor, so that your forearms do not turn out.

Reach the soles of your feet up, draw your inner thighs back lightly. You’ll want to lengthen your tailbone up toward your heels and engage your abdominal muscles to help steady your body in the pose. Lift and spread your toes.

As you activate your legs, they will become firmer, creating a sense of lightness and ease. Slow down your breath to strengthen your lungs and help steady your body.

In the beginning of practice, you will likely focus on physical balance. As you cultivate steadiness, make subtle adjustments to deepen your sense of “being” in the pose.

For example, connect the bases of your big toes, as though creating a seal between your feet. Soften your eyes and muscles of your face. It is helpful to direct your gaze just beyond the tip of your nose or at a point on the floor.

Stay for 5-15 breaths. Gradually increase the length of your stay by a few more breaths each time you practice. You can work toward staying for up to 10 minutes or longer.

To come out, bend your knees and lower your feet to the floor. Rest in Balasana (Child’s Pose), allow your neck to release and your entire body to relax.

Avoid practicing Sirsasana on the first few days of your moon cycle, or if you have head, neck or shoulder injuries, high blood pressure or heart conditions. Ask your teacher to show you how to do headstand if you have never practiced this pose before.

The ancients advise practicing this pose during the pre-dawn ambrosial time of the morning. As the sun rises, its radiant beams awaken the pituitary and pineal glands and stimulate the expansion of consciousness, the ascension of the spirit.

In headstand, the winds of energy that are generally moving toward the feet and out through the senses come back toward the central channel of the spine and deeply in toward the core of our being. Gravity assists this flow of energy toward the crown of the head, or the “aperture” through which the soul is said to enter and leave the body upon birth and death.

Beginners will benefit by using a wall and taking more weight into the arms to help with stability. With practice, as the body becomes firmer and lighter, you can take more weight directly onto the crown of your head, settling the mind into a soulful seat of comfort and ease.

Chrisandra teaches Sirsasana and other practices to balance spirit and soul at 5 classes weekly at Yoga Tree.

*This article was inspired by the teachings of Michael Meade.